We are Unitarian Universalists...

...Resistance is futile...You will be assimilated.
 
[WARNING: SHAMELESS PROSELYTIZING]
 
Why might you be assimilated? Because you may be a Unitarian Universalist, and just not know it yet! Take the good ol' belief-o-matic test and see. (I'm sure you've done the belief-o-matic before, it's been bounced around the 'net about a zillion times.) I'm convinced that UUism is highly compatible with the geeky demographic of my readership (all 6 of you, but there will be more soon!). To be fair, I suspect UUism comes ranked highly in many belief-o-matic results because UUism is compatible with a fairly wide set of beliefs.
 
Here are some Unitarian Universalist jokes:
 
Q: Why are Unitarian Universalists such lousy hymn singers?
A: Because they're always scanning ahead to see whether they agree with the lyrics or not.
 
Q: How do you know you've angered the Unitarian Universalist branch of the KKK?
A: You look outside one morning and find a burning question mark on your lawn.
 
A Unitarian Universalist died, and to his surprise discovered that there was indeed an afterlife. The angel in charge of these things told him, "Because you were an unbeliever and a doubter and a skeptic, you will be sent to Hell for all eternity -- which, in your case, consists of a place where no one will disagree with you ever again!"
 
Here are my results on the belief-o-matic:
 
1.  Unitarian Universalism  (100%) [Of course!]
2.  Secular Humanism (98%)
3.  Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (90%)
4.  Liberal Quakers (87%)
5.  Nontheist (72%)
6.  Neo-Pagan (69%)
7.  Theravada Buddhism (67%)
8.  Reform Judaism (60%)
9.  Baha'i Faith (58%)
10.  Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (57%)
11.  Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (53%)
12.  New Age (52%)
13.  Taoism (51%)
14.  New Thought (50%)
15.  Sikhism (46%)
16.  Scientology (45%)
17.  Mahayana Buddhism (40%)
18.  Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (40%)
19.  Orthodox Quaker (34%)
20.  Jehovah's Witness (30%)
21.  Eastern Orthodox (23%)
22.  Islam (23%)
23.  Jainism (23%)
24.  Orthodox Judaism (23%)
25.  Roman Catholic (23%)
26.  Hinduism (23%)
27.  Seventh Day Adventist (20%)

Comments

Anthony said…
No suprises on my end - I'm a mainline to liberal christian protestant, as fitting with my Methodist mission school upbringing.
grishnash said…
Yeah, you got me, but it's very very close. Probably there should be some kind of playoff structure between the top four. Semifinal seedings: UU vs. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants, Therevada Buddists vs. Secular Humanists! Let the fight for my adherance begin!
Zachary Drake said…
>UU vs. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants, Therevada Buddists vs. Secular Humanists!

Now that's a fight I'd pay a pay-per-view fee to see!

Liberal Christians to UUs: You're just a watered down version of us! You stole all our hymns and made the lyrics more wishy-washy! You don't even believe in anything!

UUs to Liberal Christians: We're everything you always wanted from Christianity, without all the ridiculous metaphysical claptrap that you still half-heartedly ask your congregations to swallow!

I don't really know enough about Thereveda Buddhism to do that fight justice.

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