I'm safe from the draft!

Well, if this administration ever decides to renew the draft, I'll be safe. What gives me such confidence? I'm an actor. And I guess that's tantamount to being openly gay, as far as the military is concerned. Of course, I've mainly been involved with professional theater, rather than community theater. So maybe that doesn't count.

By the way, if they do institute the draft, will anyone be able to dodge it by claiming to be gay? Did anyone do this back in the Vietnam era?

UPDATE: Conservative (in the Colbert sense of the word) Jon Swift is thankful that community theater actors are being kept out of the military:

But community theater players are different. You can spot them a mile away by the way they overemote, declaim too loudly and don't seem to know what to do with their hands. There is no way that such people can fit into our well-oiled military machine. Amateur actors are also easily prone to blackmail. All the enemy would have to do is offer one of them a lead in a local Iraqi production of Jesus Christ Superstar and he would be spilling our most guarded military secrets. I'm glad to see that the Pentagon has its priorities straight, so to speak, in keeping these bad actors out of the theater of battle.