Robert Frost, updated for the 90's
Whose crack this is I think I know
His house is in the Village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To steal some cash and snort some blow.
My strung out whore must think it queer
To stop without some needles near,
Between the park and Avenue A
She knows that smack is comon here.
She gives her nipple pierce a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the beep
Of my dealer calling for his take.
This coke is lovely, white and cheap
But I have promises to keep,
And deals to do before I sleep,
And deals to do before I sleep.
This parody of Robert Frost's classic "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening" was written by someone in my college sketch comedy group back in the mid-90's. I think it was Alexis Soloski, but I'm not sure (it wasn't me, though I wish it was). It popped unbidden into my mind as I woke up this morning, and it seems like the sort of thing that should be on a blog somewhere. You can find the original in a zillion anthologies or here or about a zillion other places on the web.